Everyone tends to get angry at one time or another in their lifetime. Some overcome anger issues quite easily and have no difficulty controlling it, while others struggle with their anger.
Issues with anger management just don’t spring up overnight, they grow like weeds, starting from a seed and growing over time under the right conditions and nurturing.
Thoughts are powerful when it comes to dealing with anger, it is the soil for seeds of anger to either flourish or perishes. Being aware of our thoughts is essential, what we constantly think about or dwell upon in our thoughts sets the overall tone of how we will feel and react to life situations daily. So if we are thinking about things that uupset us, anger us or that are negative in general we automatically begin to feel and act unpleasant or angry.
People who are close to us like our spouses, children, siblings, parents, friends all tend to feel the brunt of our angry emotions. Experiencing anger towards someone can be traced directly to what is being thought of that individual. If thoughts of complaining, finding faults, criticizing etc of a person is constant in our thoughts it will only be natural that feelings and ultimately our actions/ behavior towards that person will be negative thereby affecting our relationship.
Adjusting these thoughts is critical in dealing with anger, replacing negative thoughts with new positive ones of people even though they might not be perfect in every way allows us room to eliminate the root of anger and recreate new feelings and appreciation for these people and their differences. What a big difference that would make in our relationships with others, making life much easier to live daily.
The weight of anger is a rather heavy load to walk around with added to the other challenges that life bring along our way. Imagine a life free of anger, where relationships thrive and are peaceful, all because of taking the single step being aware of our thoughts and keeping them pure.
“The Good Points
Standard Oil was once one of the biggest companies in the world, led by the famous John D Rockefeller. On one occasion a company executive made a bad decision. It cost the firm $2 million. This was the late 1800’s and $2 million was a huge sum.
Edward Bedford, a partner in the company had an appointment to see Rockefeller. When he entered Rockefeller’s office he saw his boss bent over a piece of paper, busily scribbling notes. When Rockefeller finally looked up he said to Bedford, “I suppose you’ve heard about our loss? I’ve been thinking it over,” Rockefeller said, “and before I ask the man in to discuss the matter, I’ve been making some notes.”
Bedford looked across the table and saw the page Rockefeller had been scribbling on. Across the top of the page was the heading, “Points in favour of Mr __________.” Below the heading was a long list of the man’s good qualities, including notes of three occasions where he had made decisions that had earned the company many times more than his error had lost.
Bedford later said, “I never forgot that lesson. In later years, whenever I was tempted to rip into anyone, I forced myself first to sit down and thoughtfully compile as long a list of good points as I possibly could. Invariably, by the time I finished my inventory, I would see the matter in its true perspective and keep my temper under control. There is no telling how many times this habit has prevented me from committing one of the costliest mistakes any executive can make — losing his temper.”
In the Done With Anger, One-day Intensive Anger Management Class You will discover effective ways of handling your emotions and dealing Anger Management Classes that arise at various stages of your life.
Source: reported in Bits & Pieces, September 15, 1994